“What would you choose to do if you had unlimited resources?” was the question asked in the book I’m currently reading; Change your life in 7 days by Paul Mckenna. He says, just before asking the question, to open your thinking, to allow your mind to dream and dream big…well maybe some of those are my words too, but that’s the idea, to dream big.

So dream big I did, in fact it’s a dream that I’ve had before, it’s the one where I open a coaching centre for young people. It’s more than a coaching centre, it’s a place where young people receive coaching, creative, confidence, self esteem, career, communication training. All underpinned with the coaching ethos, to enable them to be the best they can be, doing what they love.

Working in groups and individually with coaches, NLPers, and creative practitioners. The work would explore all the senses, almost like a school…perhaps it is a school, an alternative school where the aim is to learn about self through the arts, creativity, coaching and NLP.

It would be like all the best projects I’ve ever done rolled into one. Visits to the theatre, where we explore the characters and their relationships to each other, seeing how we would play out their roles differently, returning back to the centre where we role play the events. Using a mixture of Forum Theatre, NLP, coaching and artwork.

We would also have creative development days, spending time exploring the minds of great creative thinkers from history, from present and of course the future. Young people have wonderfully creative minds, however tif hat creativity is not put to productive use it can create all sorts of problems. So we would look at how they can use their creativity in positive ways.

There are lots of young entrepreneurs projects, and I’m sure they do wonderful work. We would not only work with the young people and their ideas, we would also enable their ideas to take shape, creating role models for the future. And jobs right now, jobs doing what the young people love.

We would have healthy foods and exercise, team sports and meditation. A space where young people can discover what they are good at, where there skills lay, and a safe supportive place where they can explore their futures.

Of course this would be expensive, but it’s a dream, and while I’m dreaming lets have the very best in technology available, lets have a design space where the young people create the technologies of the future. With music and fashion studios. And at the front a shop where we sell what we create.

This is a wonderful dream, I wonder what your dreams might be? And who is there to help and support making our dreams come true?

Yesterday I spoke about the 5 steps you can take to enable a smooth, engaging and creative session when working with young people. You can use these steps if you are a teacher, youth coach or mentor.

This morning as I was thinking about these steps and how you might employ them, a thought came to mind. Often we spend a lot of time and energy working on new skills that we haven’t done learnt before, as opposed to doing what we know, young people love to do the things that were already good at.

I think it’s important to remember that and give them to space to enjoy the confidence that comes from doing something they are already skilled at.

Now I’m not saying only do what they know, of course not. We need to enable young people to extend and develop their skill set, to push the boundaries of their comfort zone, as well as learning how they learn new skills

But I’m sure you remember how it feels when you have a skills or ability that you’ve honed over time, and are given the chance to share your ability.

When you are working with young people, remember to give them the chance to shine, to feel good about themselves. To recognise that they have skills and abilities. In Dream Tree Coaching, this is represented by the star, their star quality.

So my suggestion is, that when working with a group, especially for the first time, to explore what they are already good at. And over time, as the rapport and trust builds, to re-ask the question; “What are you good at?” 

Give yourself and the young people the safe space and time to explore their own skills as well as developing new ones. Take the time to explore how the things they are already good at link onto the new learning you are exploring. And by making those links, the steps to the new learning become smaller, easier, less daunting. Thus removing resistance and creating flow.

Take a few moments to ask yourself the question “What are you good at?” and post your responses below.

]]> http://www.thesmartschool.co.uk/youthcoaching-blog/what-are-you-good-at/feed/ 0 http://www.thesmartschool.co.uk/youthcoaching-blog/5-steps-to-working-with-young-people/ http://www.thesmartschool.co.uk/youthcoaching-blog/5-steps-to-working-with-young-people/#comments Thu, 30 Aug 2012 19:55:18 +0000 Robert Stephenson http://www.thesmartschool.co.uk/youthcoaching-blog/?p=332 Continue reading →]]>

Recently I’ve been working on developing training for mentors. It’s part of the Mosaic mentoring in schools programe. The mentors are from local businesses, a lot of whom have not worked with or mentored young people. So part of the training is to get them to recognise their skills that can be shared with the young people, to be open to understanding young people and their world, as well as developing their confidence to work with the young people.

Now when I talk about confidence to work with the young people, it’s more about developing the confidence to work with young people when things are going…not as planned.

As a Youth Coach, I know that there are days when the plan just doesn’t seem to be working. This can be because one of the young people are in a particularly bad mood, upset, challenged by the work, or just having an off day. It can also be because I haven’t understood the young people and their needs.

So if you are going to work with young people, as a coach, mentor or teacher, there are a few things you can do to enable your sessions to go as close to plan as possible. Although I have to say, that sometimes throwing the plan out is just what’s needed.

• Check in with the group or individual. Get a sense of how they are currently feeling, understand what is going on for them, right now and recently. Also check in with what is coming next in their worlds.
• Listen to what is said and unsaid. Really hear the words that are being used, and check their meaning. Coaching and NLP enable you to develop your sensory skills. There is so much to be learnt form body language, watch it, read it, check it.
• Share your plan. A lot of young people are not given the bigger picture, or the opportunity to discus, develop or change it. Which leads to flexibility.
• Flexibility is a strength, the strength to let go of your plans, and your ego. Often we hold onto our plans because we feel that, that is part of our control, or part of our identity, and if we let go of it then we are giving something up.
• Creativity to develop interesting and engaging sessions/lessons. And remember to bring your own creativity in. Use your known creative skills, be that music, storytelling or art.

Putting these steps into play when working with young people, will enable your session to run more smoothly, and if you are able to manage your own state then you are onto a winner.

I’d be interested to know the results you get from taking these steps. And the steps that you take to enable smooth, productive and engaging sessions, when  you’re coaching/mentoring young people.

Recently I was asked the question;

“Why are you a Life coach, a Youth Coach…why do you do what you do?”

The short answer is, it’s needed, young people growing up today, right now, need someone who is able to allow them to see who they are, the potential they have, and the steps/action needed to achieve their goals, to reach their potential.

The long answer will take a couple of posts, so lets start at the beginning, the place where the passion was first forged.

It’s back in the day and I’m at school, primary school and a few of the classes are in the main hall, a man in a white coat walks in and asks for our help. He is supposed to be meeting another scientist, who hasn’t turned up and they have an experiment that they need to do.

Now back then I had no idea that this was a piece of Educational Theatre, that he was an actor, and the design of the interactive play was to get us thinking, exploring colour and it’s parts.

To this day I still remember it, I remember colouring in the triangels on a circle with primary colours and spinning it around so fast that it became one colour, it became white. I then had the idea of putting the circle on the pottery wheel and seeing if we could get it to spin fast enough to create white. And we did.

So how did this event create the Youth Coach of today? Well firstly engagement, this event engaged me like no other before, the actors listened to us, heard our ideas, and allowed us the space to try things out. This space is the space that I now create as a Youth Coach. I work with the space to create a freedom, a non judgemental approach, like all good coaches, that enables the young people to give their ideas a go.

But not only give their ideas a go, but to have the ideas. As a young person growing up there are many challenges. One of them being the challenge to get things right. Young people grow up in a world where play and exploration are being pushed out, for the right answer. Although businesses want the creative mind, the new idea, the imagination to create new and interesting products. Lots of schools have gone into an academic right way of doing things, without the exploration, play and use of imagination.

As a Youth Coach, as a Creative Youth Coach, I bring back that space, open that space so that the young people can experiment with their ideas and their thinking. Can try new things out and do things in different ways.

As a Youth Coach you have to be engaging, you have to be able to walk into a room of young people and begin a conversation that takes them on a journey, that enables the space for creativity, thinking, exploration and curiosity to dance.

As adults we sometimes forget the power of our words, and how a little encouragement can open the door to a young persons future.  Now I can’t say that it was only because of this event, but I went on to train as an actor and become a theatre in education teacher before becoming a Youth Coach, but that’s another story that I’ll share in a future post.

Right now what I want to say to you is, as a Youth Coach, as a Practitioner that works with young people, your actions, and your words have the power to turn a young persons life around. Youth Coaches are role models, and as such need to take that on, need to behave in a positive, encouraging, supportive manner from before you walk into that school, youth club or community centre. And at the end of your session or coaching, that authentic desire to inspire young people to achieve their dreams, needs to live on, needs to be visible so that as you walk down the corridor, leave the school, get on that train or into your car, the young people see that that is you, and that you want the very best for them, not just in the session, but in life.

The actors I worked with all those years ago had this, and by behaving in this way captured or ignited something in me that burns bright to this very day. For me it was the beginning of the passion, of having an idea, taking actions and seeing the idea come to life. The beginnings of knowing that with the right support and encouragement, I could have new ideas and take action to create their reality.

Back then I had no idea about Youth Coaching, and perhaps in the job you currently do, the work isn’t called Youth Coaching, but it’s enabling young people to have ideas and dreams and goals. And you might be helping them find ways to create their dreams.

So perhaps like those actors you are already a kind of life coach, and what you do will enable a young person to go a magical journey, perhaps similar to mine, where they explore their possibilities, and in doing so they become amazing adults.

If you have all the skills to do that, then keep doing what your doing. However if you are missing something, then perhaps these posts will help you find it, perhaps becoming a Dynamic Youth Coach will enable you to find that missing piece, enabling you to step into the role, to facilitate, encourage and inspirer young people to be great adults.

]]> http://www.thesmartschool.co.uk/youthcoaching-blog/why-i-do-what-i-do-part-1-the-theatre-company/feed/ 0 http://www.thesmartschool.co.uk/youthcoaching-blog/remember-the-individual/ http://www.thesmartschool.co.uk/youthcoaching-blog/remember-the-individual/#comments Mon, 18 Jun 2012 20:58:15 +0000 Robert Stephenson http://www.thesmartschool.co.uk/youthcoaching-blog/?p=182 Continue reading →]]>

I was just reading The Structure of Magic, well flicking through the pages, when a sentence caught my eye;

“Remember that each individual that comes to see you has their own life experiences”

And this reminded me that each child has their own life experiences, they maybe in a class full of children their own age, their own gender, but they are full of their very own experiences, memories, wants and desires.

When running the Dream Tree Coaching workshops, I am constantly reminded of this, as each of the young people pick their own dream, goals and future visions. Even when working with a year six class, who have been together for years, they all have their own ideas for their futures.

As a Youth Coach, it is important to remember this, to treat each child as an individual and not get caught up in the generalisation game. Which is easy to do, especially if your working with a whole school, or multiple year groups of the same age.

So what’s the solution here? Well one thing you can do is listen deeply to the child you are communicating with. Really hear what they have to say. Ask questions to fully understand them. Even in large groups take the time on each individual. Let the group know that you want to hear all their voices and will take the time to do so.

You still have to be engaging, and dynamic, and facilitate the process. A balancing act yes, but one worth the hard work.

So there you are standing at the school gate about to walk in to coach a young person, teacher or class and you’re focused and ready to go. You ring the buzzer, they let you in and you’re at reception.

Now a lot of coaches, want to get straight to the client and begin the session, however a great coach knows that the coaching begins the moment you walk onto the school grounds. In fact it might even begin before that, because as a coach you are also a role model, and as you travel to school you may well be passed by the very young people you will be coaching.

Once your there, at reception, you want to get rapport with the office staff. When I worked as a theatre practitioner, we were always told to make friends with the office staff and the care takers, also the dinner ladies. Back then it was about having an easy life, now as a youth coach it’s about coaching the whole school.

The way the office staff treat you will give you a good indication to the rest of the schools environment, both emotionally and morale wise.

As you make your way around the school, you want to be checking in with your surroundings, talking to staff to get a feel for their morale. Saying hi to the young people you pass in the corridor to see how they respond, recognising that as a stranger they may not respond to you at all, as part of their stranger awareness training.

And once you’ve finished your session, it’s important to check in with the office staff before you go, letting them know how you got on, when you’ll be back and if there is anything they need form you, remembering to always have your CRB with you, as well as your driving licence or passport.

I wonder what else you could think of doing that will enable you to have a great coaching relationship with the whole school? Leave a comment and let me know.

So there I was in a class full of young people who didin’t want to be there, and more importantly, didn’t want to be there with me!

We spent an hour with me asking questions, attempting to get some kind of rapport going, asking about their interests, wants and goals.

Needless to say today I wasn’t getting very far. The group had developed a new level of resistance, and it would seem that every new response, action or approach I took, was met at the pass. At one point I felt like a cowboy who had been sent into town only to be surrounded by the outlaws, who had no time for reasoning.

In that moment I could feel my own tension rising, my own anxiety. I wanted to get through to the group and felt that I was failing. So I decided to take a break, knowing that some of them might not come back, but a break was needed.

After 15 minutes of deep breathing, circle of excellence, bringing to mind my great teachers and mentors, and seeing it from their, the young people’s point of view, I went back into the class.

Once in the classroom, I began chatting to the young people, just about the work I do, youth coaching, teaching drama, directing, stage combat, to which a group of boys said “Can we do that sir… fight? Can you teach us that stuff” 

“Yes of course I can.”

We went through some of the safety aspects first, then spent 20 minutes putting a fight scene together, sharing it with the rest of their class and support workers.

The boys, now please with their work, decided it was time to leave, head out into the sunshine, a full hour before the end of class!

I could feel the tension returning when one of the girls asked if she could speak with me. She had been working on a monologue for a sharing and wondered if I could help her with it. For the next hour we worked on her performance, with me asking questions about the character; who, what, why, when, where, how?

At some point during this time, we moved form directing to coaching, without talking about it, without naming it, but both knowing that we were not just talking about the character. The questions became about how the character might be different from her, what she might do differently to the character?

We started to play around with the “What if’s” looking for something similar in her life to that of the character, exploring the options that the character might have. During these questions, I gave her lots of time as I could see some serious thinking going on.

And then she nodded her head, asking if she could show me one more time. She stood up and performed an amazing monologue, with an emotional journey that brought tears to the eyes, a real mature understanding of the plight of her character, a tenderness and innocents.

When she finished, she drifted into her own little world for a few moments, and came back with a smile.

“That was amazing, well done. How was it for you?” she looked at me and simply said’

“Some days are tough days, but I think I’ll get through” She then stood up thanked me and left, leaving me wondering who had been the coach and who had been the client?

It’s late Sunday night and I’ve just finished preparing for tomorrows presentation. In fact I’m not presenting, it’s my third year drama students. They will be sharing their Theatre and Education plays and related workshops. Some of them will be using the style of Forum Theatre, this style enables the audience to make changes in the characters actions, enabling the characters to explore different options and outcomes, in order to create the desired result. I trained in this style when I was at drama school, back then I thought it was a great way to explore issues with a group, as the shows were performed in schools and youth centres. The plays were designed to explore the challenges of a group, and by exploring the options that the group put forward, the group would create the choices that they could take when faced with the situation themselves.

Now, years later, after becoming a coach, I see how closely these styles are linked. The main aim of forum theatre is for the audience to give the characters as many options as possible, with the show reflecting similar issues to that of the audience. With coaching you are exploring the same, the client has an issue or challenge and you the coach, facilitate their exploration of choices. As a coach you might future pace or visualise with your client, with forum theatre they act out the choice in front of you, exploring the hurdles that might occur. This is a great way to work with a group, and as a youth coach it’s a great tool to explore. Using characters to explore a challenge that the group might face, getting the group to offer options, points of views and ideas. In the past, I have told the story of the characters challenge to a group of young people, then through discussion, we have explored what might be possible, and as the coach I am able to support and question what the young people offer, checking in with their own values and challenging their ideas in order to create deeper thinking, as well as managing the groups input, making sure everyone has the option to put their ideas forward and to question the possibilities put forward by others.

Once you develop a strong positive rapport with a group, you can even ask them to act out/role play their ideas. This enables you to work with a group on their challenges through stories and characters that they explore, sometimes able to relate to the challenges as their own, and at the same time they are free to work with the challenges without having to publicly own them. Giving the young people the freedom to explore and challenge in a safe environment.

So next time you are coaching a group of young people, you could give this a go and see how you get on. You might go for the story, the characters with a challenge or create a drama that they act out in order to explore possible choices. Let me know how you get on or if you want some more details in how to set up the work.