Monthly Archives: August 2012

“What are you good at?”

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Yesterday I spoke about the 5 steps you can take to enable a smooth, engaging and creative session when working with young people. You can use these steps if you are a teacher, youth coach or mentor.

This morning as I was thinking about these steps and how you might employ them, a thought came to mind. Often we spend a lot of time and energy working on new skills that we haven’t done learnt before, as opposed to doing what we know, young people love to do the things that were already good at.

I think it’s important to remember that and give them to space to enjoy the confidence that comes from doing something they are already skilled at.

Now I’m not saying only do what they know, of course not. We need to enable young people to extend and develop their skill set, to push the boundaries of their comfort zone, as well as learning how they learn new skills

But I’m sure you remember how it feels when you have a skills or ability that you’ve honed over time, and are given the chance to share your ability.

When you are working with young people, remember to give them the chance to shine, to feel good about themselves. To recognise that they have skills and abilities. In Dream Tree Coaching, this is represented by the star, their star quality.

So my suggestion is, that when working with a group, especially for the first time, to explore what they are already good at. And over time, as the rapport and trust builds, to re-ask the question; “What are you good at?” 

Give yourself and the young people the safe space and time to explore their own skills as well as developing new ones. Take the time to explore how the things they are already good at link onto the new learning you are exploring. And by making those links, the steps to the new learning become smaller, easier, less daunting. Thus removing resistance and creating flow.

Take a few moments to ask yourself the question “What are you good at?” and post your responses below.

5 steps to working with young people.

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Recently I’ve been working on developing training for mentors. It’s part of the Mosaic mentoring in schools programe. The mentors are from local businesses, a lot of whom have not worked with or mentored young people. So part of the training is to get them to recognise their skills that can be shared with the young people, to be open to understanding young people and their world, as well as developing their confidence to work with the young people.

Now when I talk about confidence to work with the young people, it’s more about developing the confidence to work with young people when things are going…not as planned.

As a Youth Coach, I know that there are days when the plan just doesn’t seem to be working. This can be because one of the young people are in a particularly bad mood, upset, challenged by the work, or just having an off day. It can also be because I haven’t understood the young people and their needs.

So if you are going to work with young people, as a coach, mentor or teacher, there are a few things you can do to enable your sessions to go as close to plan as possible. Although I have to say, that sometimes throwing the plan out is just what’s needed.

  • Check in with the group or individual. Get a sense of how they are currently feeling, understand what is going on for them, right now and recently. Also check in with what is coming next in their worlds.
  • Listen to what is said and unsaid. Really hear the words that are being used, and check their meaning. Coaching and NLP enable you to develop your sensory skills. There is so much to be learnt form body language, watch it, read it, check it.
  • Share your plan. A lot of young people are not given the bigger picture, or the opportunity to discus, develop or change it. Which leads to flexibility.
  • Flexibility is a strength, the strength to let go of your plans, and your ego. Often we hold onto our plans because we feel that, that is part of our control, or part of our identity, and if we let go of it then we are giving something up.
  • Creativity to develop interesting and engaging sessions/lessons. And remember to bring your own creativity in. Use your known creative skills, be that music, storytelling or art.

Putting these steps into play when working with young people, will enable your session to run more smoothly, and if you are able to manage your own state then you are onto a winner.

I’d be interested to know the results you get from taking these steps. And the steps that you take to enable smooth, productive and engaging sessions, when  you’re coaching/mentoring young people.

Creating Safe Space

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I’m doing some reading this week; Change Your Life In 7 Days by Paul McKenna. I was reading it as part of my NLP and Hypnotherapy studies, and as I’m reading it a few thoughts came to mind.

As always everything I read or come across, I think about how it would work with young people, how I can change, adapt or develop it. I have this belief that whether I’m working with adults, teenagers or young children, the approach and ideas are the same, it’s just the language that changes, and it doesn’t really change, it’s just that you find the access point for whoever it is you are working with, but the content is still the same.

The book starts off by talking about our thinking, and some of us are already aware of the ideas around, what we think we create, and that our thinking creates our experiences. Henry Ford said, ‘Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re probably right’.

So this leaves me thinking about young people’s thinking, and how we enable them to have the thoughts that says they can, how do we create environments that allow them to have positive images about themselves and their abilities.

The first points of call are the parents and the teachers, they are the ones who are in contact with young people most of their formative years. So part of enabling young people to have positive images of themselves, is by enable teachers and parents, giving them the  ability and skills to create the environments where these thoughts can be about what they can do, and how great they can be.

There are ideas that Paul McKenna shares about our thinking of ourselves, he calls it: The Three Selves; and at the heart of our three selves is our authentic self, the real us, the person we are deep down.

The work that I do with young people tells me that the only way you can access the authentic self is when the environment is one where the young people feel safe. So as Parents, Teachers, Mentors, Youth Coaches and Dynamic Youth Coaches, we have to find ways of creating this safe space. And a first step might be to ask the young people we work with, what would make a safe space for you?

I’m keen to hear their responses, so if you work with young people please ask and let me know their answers. In the mean time, perhaps ask yourself what would a safe space look like, feel like, sound like for you to be your authentic self?

Youth Coaching and The Olympics

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So there I am getting ready to take the children, all of them, well I say all, there are about nine of us, heading to the museums and parks for picnics. When I catch a bit of the Olympic news.

The Team GB cycling coach is there talking about the philosophy behind creating awesome cyclist. How they looked at how to make someone the best they could be, then applied that to the cycle track, exploring how to make them the best clclist they could be.

The presenter asked, could you apply this to other sports, and he replies, yes you can apply it to anything, because at the heart of it, it’s about making the person the best they can be, then taking that to the sport or the job.

And that’s how youth coaching works, we look at the young person, and explore how they can be the best at being themselves, then look into how this ripples into their world.

Sport has always been a place where young people are able to understand the dedication and focus it takes to be the best, perhaps as youth coaches we need to take some of that focus and dedication and apply it to coaching and mentoring. Breaking down the skill sets needed to be the best, looking at whether the young person is a sprinter or along distance runner. Taking personality types and relating them to sports…at the moment it’s a thought, perhaps there is someone out there already doing this, and I would love to hear from them.

But right now, everyone is ready for the museum, so I’d better publish this post, and while I’m out and about today the thoughts of youth coaching, sports and performance will float around and perhaps a new model will emerge or an old model revamped.

I’d love to hear your thoughts as I’ve seen a few posts about the Olympics and motivation, and youth.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if…

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Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all this positive appreciation for sporting achievement could be transfered into the classrooms, the youth clubs, the street corners. And young people began to see how hard work and determination works.

If they could see that setting goals in the first place, was one of the first steps on the journey to achieving them and the work you put into achieving them was the second. That goals are an important part of life, being able to know what you want and move towards it, knowing what you are aiming for, able to put the hard work in and be supported in the process.

Like the sports men and women, supported by your coach, trainer, physio, family, and all the people that are in the background, enabling you to make it happen.

And I wonder how many young people feel this support around them? From school, friends, and family. How many of them have a Youth Coach to work with them, a Mentor to share their knowledge and experience.

Some schools are doing a fabulous job of supporting their young people, other schools are doing the best they can. As a Youth Coach, I want everybody, every young person to have that support, that guidance, to be in a position where they are able to see the opportunities and possibilities of the life before them, able to see the positive changes and contributions they can make.

Working with young people can be challenging, I know this to be true, however when you get past that, get to where they are, their start point and work with them. The rewards are amazing and something to be proud of, both for you and them.

I listened to the athlete, the long jumper who is now an Olympic gold medalist, Greg Rutherford, talk about nearly giving it all up, and with the help of the team behind him was able to continue. Wouldn’t it be great if we could be part of that team for young people, as teachers, coaches and mentors. Working with them to achieve their own golds, their own goals.

I work in schools, youth clubs, summer schools and on projects to be part of making this happen. Let me know where and how you work with young people to facilitate their goals and dreams, perhaps we can find ways to work together.